Lockdown

Hey everybody, firstly, I’d like to apologise for the fact that I’ve not written on here for many months. My blog means a lot to me and I’m not sure why I’ve not written on it. I guess I’ve just overlooked it because of recent events – I’m very sorry. But I’m back and I’m going to try my best to keep my blog up-to-date while I have very little on my plate.

My lifestyle was very hectic and heavy before the Coronavirus pandemic made its way to the UK. I was working for 16 hours a week, I was at school for about 35 hours a week, I was learning to drive and I was training for a marathon all while I was revising for my A-Levels so I could go to university and live my dream.

Although it was expected, I remember the moment that truly changed my life. I was out on a driving lesson until 5:30PM and was expecting an announcement from the UK government at 5PM. When I returned home from my lesson, my life had truly changed. The government had decided to close all UK schools on the following Friday for the ‘foreseeable future’. They had also decided to cancel this years exams for GCSE and A-Level students. It was the cancellation of exams which truly hurt. I wasn’t going to be able to show off everything that I had learnt during to course and I wasn’t going to be able get the grades that I knew I was capable of. My whole future was up in the air and I had no idea what the next steps were. I understood the decisions made since the virus was getting out of control and we needed to keep people safe but I couldn’t help but feel completely lost and like I had wasted 2 years of my life studying for something that would no longer be.

The next 2 days at school were honestly the hardest days I had had at school in a long time. I had no idea if that was it or if I’d be returning to school before the end of the school year and I still don’t know. I want to go back because I want to be able to say goodbye to all the people who have had a huge impact on my life between 2013 and today. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to do that.

Things got harder when I got a phone call from work Friday evening who told me that we would be closing for at least 2 weeks but possibly longer and I was not to go in the following day. In the space of 48 hours I had lost the two things that kept me busy and sane. I went from working 7 days a week to 0 and found myself twiddling my thumbs all day everyday.

With the first week of the lockdown over, I have been able to get into a little bit of a routine and keep my head above water. I’ve spoken to many of my friends and looked out for their sanity as well as my own. I’ve been reading a lot more and I’ve been trying to continue with my courses so I have something to do. It hasn’t been easy and I imagine that it’s not been any easier for the rest of the country too. We can get through this.

Things will get easier. We just have to follow the guidelines set by the people in charge to stay safe. My hearts go out to everyone suffering from the illness, those who have lost loved ones and those who are finding it difficult to cope. We can do this and we will do this.


Yugen – A thought about the universe which triggers an emotional response too deep to define.

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