My exams are now officially over and I am so excited to get this show on the road. Here comes ‘my long summer.’ Over the next 12 weeks, I will be embarking on the mission of my life. Not only will I be attending NCS, but I will be attempting to spend the next few months being far more positive about life. I think it would be a really good idea for me to allow myself to get some real headspace before A-Levels begin. I know the next couple of years will be stressful but I am ready to give it my absolute all.
To sum up, they were so hard! But, it was so worth it. I had a great time during study leave and exams. There were times where I wanted to just give up, but there were also times where I felt on top of the world. Some days were much better than others but the experience was incredible. Don’t get me wrong, I’m nervous for my results. I’m predicted some cracking grades but I can’t help but think that I haven’t done very well. This is just the way the mind works, unfortunately, it tries to convince you that you’re not doing well even if you’re putting everything you’ve got into it.
The next stage of my life is important, it’s one that I’ve been looking forward to for the last couple of years. I got to a point in life where I was so done with the mainstream school. I was bullied badly and I just wanted out and now I’m out and I’m so excited. I don’t have to put up with those people who made my life a misery anymore and that has to be the thing that’s making me happiest.
Anyway, Stage 2 commences and it’s all about the A-Levels, not just the subjects, but the experiences of being free from the regular mainstream school and from the regular day-to-day I feel will help me to escape the horrible thoughts that go through my mind on the daily most days.
I know I’ve been banging on about this for the last few posts but works can’t really describe how excited I am to go. If you know me well, you will know that I have NEVER been on holiday not even in this country. My family have never felt like going and it’s never really crossed our minds. The only time any of my family went on holiday would have been my parent’s honeymoon. Personally, I’ve never had the chance to experience a holiday. Even though NCS isn’t technically a holiday, It will be good enough for me!
I would like to apologise for the lack of posts and the short posts recently. The reasoning behind this would just be the fact that I am super busy and right now all I want to do is relax. I’ve finished what has been the most stressful point of my life so far and I’m knackered. But don’t worry, there is so much more to come over the next 3 months!
Yugen – An emotional response about the world too deep for words.